Things I Did Today Before Taking a Shower

So today I totally needed a shower, since I neglected to take one yesterday, what with being too busy napping and pigging out on nachos. I spent today constantly thinking “OMG SO GRODY NEED BATHING” and spent a lot of time complaining to myself about needing to take a shower, but instead of just taking a shower like a normal person, here’s what I did first:

Fed Henry and Eleanor Cheerios in a bowl with milk for breakfast, the first time they’ve eaten cereal like big kids instead of straight out of their snack traps. They were very amazed that Mom poured milk into a (*gasp*) BOWL instead of a sippy cup. They enjoyed eating with their spoons, and didn’t spill! Henry even asked for seconds and a teeny bit of thirds.

Walked down my hallway, attempted to navigate around a toy and a twin, caught my foot in my pant leg, completely crashed face-first onto the floor, hobbled around on sore leg for rest of day.

Left the house in the sweatpants that I wore yesterday and my hoodie with the front pocket falling off, took the babies to a fun twins club playgroup, was happy that people recognized me as a fellow mom instead of a smelly, unclean vagrant that stumbled in off the street.

Chose sleep over personal hygiene and napped when Henry and Eleanor did.

Finished the final book in the Princess Diaries series (shut up; yes, I am aware that I’m 35 years old).

Unsuccessfully tried to catch up on email while Henry and Eleanor watched Signing Time.

Ate cereal for two out of three meals.

Changed out of sweatpants and sweatshirt into sweater and jeans grabbed from the laundry pile, attended monthly twins club meeting, had fun socializing with other moms.

Came home, chatted with Andy, complained about my general disgusting-ness.

FINALLY TOOK A DAMN SHOWER.


Um, Mom? Could you, like, back up a few steps? You kinda smell.